Understanding the Early Years of Adulthood - Part Four

Career Field—

What will you spend your life doing? There are many noble things to do with your life. Ministry is good. Faithful Christians in secular fields are vital also. The question is not “what do you want to do?” As we’ll see later, that can be a dangerous way to think. The question is—what is your destiny? What were you made to do? What fulfills your eternal purpose for being on this planet? When you answer that question, you will be truly happy.

Chances are you know what you want. Scary thing is you may or may not be right. I mean, what you think you want may be absolutely wrong for your destiny. In which case, you won’t know it until a few years down the road—probably after you exit the mistake zone. So, you will have to make a choice, but you have no real way of knowing that what you want is what God wants. Sounds too bizarre for reality, but it’s true. The world is full of elderly people who never really found their purpose for being alive. You don’t have to become one of them.

Marriage—

Who will you marry? What kind of person will you marry—I mean, beyond “pretty” or “handsome”? Come on, go a little deeper than that. How will you know this person is emotionally stable? How will you be guaranteed you won’t end up deserted, cheated on, or left hanging out to dry? Thousands of couples every year, who once stood at a wedding altar madly in love, stand in a living room beating each other’s brains out or stand in a courtroom fighting over cars and kids. People who once dreamed of living in love for the rest of their lives now live in hate. How can that happen? What makes you exempt? No one thinks it will happen to them.

Your marriage will not be perfect. At best it will be a solid relationship that forges through trials to become a refined lifetime love. That’s at best. No marriage is easy, and no marriage just falls into perfect place. Happy marriages and lifetime loves are discovered through years of commitment and personal change. But happy marriages are worth fighting for. They are always happier after the forging process than they were before it. The whole relationship gets better over time, but how will you know for sure that you’ve got someone committed to loving that intensely?

How will this person treat your children? How will they respond when you do something stupid? How will they spend money or keep the house? What will it take to really make them “ticked off.” Just what does this person do when he or she is “ticked off”? What will he or she want to do with the rest of your life?

All of these questions are huge, and most of them cannot be answered for certain until after you’re married! Isn’t that great news! You’ll get married, and then you’ll start to really get to know the person you married. About ten years later, if you are one of the few that make it, you’ll feel like you’re starting to get to know your spouse, and you’ll thank God you followed Him—or you’ll wish you had.

Don’t freak out and say something foolish like “I’m never getting married.” In reality, marriage is awesome. It’s just not what pop-culture would lead you to believe. It’s something much different and actually much better.

The great part is God has a plan for making sure you get the right person! I'll deal with that in another post. So for now, don’t sweat it and trust the Lord.