Do You Have a Road Map for Life?

Three Ways Biblical Counsel Helps

Do you have a map for your life? Do you know where you are headed, why, and what the destination will be? Are you certain that your present decisions will actually lead you to the intended destination?
It’s amazing how few people view life with the end in mind. We sometimes fail to connect our present decisions and direction with their ultimate outcomes. So often, the outcomes are not what we intended, but after decisions are made, we are forced to live with the results.
The best way to reach your ultimate destination is to study the road-map and take the correct course. Life is no different. So, back to the original question— what is your map for life?
The fact is, there’s no better life-map than the Bible. It is God’s gift to the human race—a guidebook for life. In the Bible, God gives thousands of principles and laws for navigating through life successfully. It’s His instruction manual for how life is designed to work. The more you understand it and apply it, the better you are at discovering your true identity and your life’s calling or purpose. And apart from the Bible, we’re all destined to wind up disappointed and empty—still longing for real purpose and significance.
Here’s one really good example of a life principle from God’s Word: Get good advice for every major decision. Proverbs 11:14 states, “Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.”
Now, a lot of people break this law and live to regret it. In other words, we don’t want advice.
Sometimes we fear that a counselor will have a private agenda and won’t counsel us honestly. At other times, we presume to know what our counselors will say, and we rationalize it away without even talking to them. But most often, we don’t get advice because we would rather not hear what we already know. Self-deception is a scary thing. We would rather be wrong and fantasize that things will work out, than really build a good decision with plenty of outside, biblical advice.
To our benefit, God instructs us to bring in godly, biblical counsel for our decisions. But I find that many people sell short good counsel. They don’t fully appreciate the value of good godly advice. There are three huge dynamics in play when getting counsel. It’s not merely about getting a “yes” or “no” on a particular decision. It’s bigger than that, so let’s break it down:
1. Biblical counsel helps define a right decision.
This is the first and perhaps biggest aspect of getting advice—just determining whether or not a decision is right. I would never make a major decision in life without a team of God-fearing people standing behind me saying, “Yes, that’s the right move!” It’s not about being unduly dependent upon others to make my decisions; it’s about having confirmation from the collective wisdom of successful people. It’s about finding someone who has taken this journey successfully and borrowing his map!
2. Biblical counsel helps to define the right process.
We often miss this. It’s very easy to do the right thing the wrong way! Getting biblical advice is a great way to put a plan together. It’s not enough just to do the right thing—it needs to be done the right way. A team of wise biblical advisors will help craft a plan of attack that will give the right decision with the right process.
3. Biblical counsel helps to define the right timing.
Finally, it’s possible to do the right thing the right way, but at the wrong time! For instance, a person might have found the right spouse and have a good plan for marriage, but the timing can be way off. Getting counsel is sometimes about waiting for God to show you His plan and timing. There are few things worse than forcing our own way too quickly. If this principle helps you, the good news is there are thousands more waiting to be discovered and applied to your life. They’re all in the Bible, and a good church family, Bible study class, and a godly pastor can help you begin the process of discovery!

Be the Right Person (Guy/Girl Relationships)

It's not a Facebook group, but I'm a fan of "being the right kind of person in order to have the right kind of person."

The world's relationship model teaches young people to look for the right person. God's relationship model teaches young people to be the right person, then God will bring the right person to them. It's important for young people to learn God's model in order to spare them from the dangers and heartaches that the world's model will bring.

This past July at summer youth camp our student ministries director taught on the topic of guy/girl relationships. When the week was over, we heard comment after comment about how these young people had never heard some of the Biblical principles that were taught. You see, God's principle is a paradox. And it goes like this: finding the right person isn't about finding the right person - it's about becoming the right person.

Consider these contrasts between God's method and Hollywood's:

1. Becoming the right person places your hope in God. Trying to find the right person places your hope in another person.

2. Becoming the right person focuses on God's work in you. Trying to find the right person prevents God's work in you.

3. Becoming the right person makes you patient. Trying to find the right person makes you impatient.

4. Becoming the right person makes you strong. Trying to find the right person makes you weak.
5. Becoming the right person makes you spiritual. Trying to find the right person makes you self-centered and carnal.

6. Becoming the right person prepares you for the future. Trying to find the right person distracts you from growth.

7. Becoming the right person teaches you to trust God. Trying to find the right person teaches you to trust yourself.

8. Becoming of the right person brings spiritual growth. Trying to find the right person brings disappointment.

9. Becoming the right person settles your emotions. Trying to find the right person confuses your emotions.

10. Becoming the right person makes you want to stay pure. Trying to find the right person tempts you to lose your purity.

11. Becoming the right person I will make you a better spouse. Trying to find the right person will make you a worse spouse.

12. Becoming the right person will lead you to the right person. Trying to find the right person will lead you astray.

13. Becoming the right person places your emotional stability in God. Trying to find the right person makes you emotionally unstable.

14. Becoming the right person seeks love and acceptance from God. Trying to find the right person seeks the love and acceptance from people.

15. Becoming the right person makes God your strength. Trying to find the right person seeks strength from another person.

Someday, when you are married, following God's model will hold your marriage together, but following Hollywood's model will break it apart. I believe it is very important for young people and their parents to be willing to hear the Biblical counsel of godly pastors who know the precepts and principles on this topic. It is not worth the temporary satisfaction of pride to bring regret and possible destruction to the life of our youth. Young people need to pray daily for the wisdom of God, while refusing to trust themselves in this area, and seek godly counsel from the Word of God and the man of God.

Fighting Authority

The Lord has placed authority figures in the lives of teenagers to correct, protect, and direct them. Regrettably, many young people bristle at the thought of someone other than themselves knowing what might be best for them, subsequently hardening their hearts to any needful reproof or guidance. And while illustrations of this contempt of authority—whatever authority that may be—abundantly dot the recorded history of man, it seems as if harboring this attitude of disdain and distrust is not only characteristic of twenty-first century society but also fostered. Rather than turning to an authority figure (a godly parent, a pastor, a pastor’s wife, a youth pastor, a youth pastor’s wife, a Sunday school teacher, etc.) for counsel, young people as well as their older contemporaries position themselves against that authority, dispelling or flouting any form of leadership; even instruction received grudgingly is diced and pared until it bears only the slightest trace of original meaning.

In Hebrews 13:7, we read: “Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls...” Young people, we are commanded to obey authority, those that “have rule” over us; but perhaps there are some of who genuinely and sincerely wonder why authority should be obeyed and what their purpose is in your lives.

Correction. Much of your success or failure in life depends upon whether or not you allow godly authority to correct you. You have only lived a fraction, Lord willing, of a long life. You are still learning and experiencing that which those in authority have learned and experienced long before you were born. You must allow Biblical authority to correct you in areas where you are weak or need help. Wise you would be to hear and heed their correction and instruction.

Protection. The Biblical authority in your life is not there to harm or hurt you; it is there to help and protect you. For example, think of a field filled with hundreds of sheep. Surrounding those sheep is a chain-link fence which the shepherds have put in place for the protection of the sheep. The shepherds did not put the fence there because they hate the sheep or want them to suffer. On the contrary, they understand that, if the fence were not there, the sheep might wander onto the busy highway and become someone’s lamb chops. The same is true in your lives, young people. Satan desires to destroy you, the world wants you, and your flesh urges you to enjoy the pleasures of sin; God has placed authority in your lives to protect you from these enemies.

Direction. God has placed authority in your lives to point you in the right direction. They have been down the road you are traveling and are much wiser and more experienced than you. Authorities will help you succeed in life if you will allow them to give you direction.

Young people, please understand that authority is not your enemy! Ask yourself, how is your relationship with your authority? If it is not right, then make it right today. If you have had a bad spirit toward the God-given authority in your lives, confess it to the Lord today. Allow the authority in your life to give correction, protection, and direction. This statement has been embedded in my mind since my teenage years and has been true in my own life: “Happy is the man who finds his God-given authority then willingly submits to that authority."

Adapted

Three Reasons to Get Godly Counsel

Isn’t it amazing how often people venture into major life-changing decisions without getting any outside, biblical advice. Why do we do this to ourselves?

Sometimes we fear that a counselor will have a private agenda and won’t counsel us honestly. At other times, we presume to know what our counselors will say, and rationalize it away without even talking to them. But the most common reason we don’t get advice is because we would rather not hear what we already know. Self deception is a scary thing—we would rather be wrong and fantasize that things will work out, than really build a good decision with plenty of outside, biblical advice.

God’s Word is clear—Proverbs 11:14, “Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety.”

God instructs us to bring in a multitude of counsellors on our decisions, but I find that many Christians sell godly counsel short—they don’t get the full picture of how valuable good advice can be. There are three huge dynamics in play when getting counsel. It’s not merely about getting a “yes” or “no” on a particular decision. It’s bigger than that, so let’s break it down:

1. Counsel helps define a right decision—this is the first and perhaps biggest aspect of getting advice—just determining whether a decision is right or not. I would never make a major decision in life without a team of people standing behind me saying, “Yes, that’s the right move!” It’s not about being unduly dependent upon others to make my decisions. It’s about having confirmation from the collective wisdom of a godly team of advisors.

2. Counsel helps to define the right process—we often miss this. It’s very easy to do the right thing the wrong way! Getting biblical advice is a great way to put a plan together. It’s not enough just to do the right thing—it needs to be done the right way, and a team of wise advisors will help craft a plan of attack that will give the right decision the right process.

3. Counsel helps to define the right timing—finally, it’s possible to do the right thing the right way, but at the wrong time! For instance, a young person might have found the right person and have the right plan for marriage, but the timing can be way off. Getting counsel is sometimes about waiting for God to prove the right time.

There’s nothing better than doing the right thing, the right way, at the right time! Getting godly, biblical counsel is about putting together this kind of decision. It’s a fail-safe way of finding and doing God’s will. Are you willing to hear what you don’t want to hear? Are you willing to define the right process? Are you willing to find the right time?